#079: What Happens When Your Inner World Outgrows Your Outer Life With Lizzie Thomas

Cold Open And Welcome

SPEAKER_04 0:10

I have one song that took me over a year to write, and it was a process of me understanding that no one was coming to save me.

SPEAKER_00 0:32

Welcome to another fun edition of the For the Love of Creatives podcast. You've got your connections and community guy hosts, Dwight and Maddox. And today we are joined by the fabulous Lizzie Thomas. Welcome to the podcast, Lizzie.

SPEAKER_04 0:46

Hello. Thank you, Dwight. Thank you, Maddox. Happy to be here today.

SPEAKER_00 0:51

We're glad to have you. Yes, absolutely. Lizzie, could you share with the For the Love of Creatives audience a little bit about who you are and what you're about?

SPEAKER_04 1:02

Absolutely. I would love to. I am Lizzie, Lizzie Thomas. I am a jazz singer, songwriter, producer, musician. I am from the South of America, like the good old brought-up in the South, and really wanted to move to the big city and the jazz capital world. So I moved to New York City. I've lived

From The South To NYC Jazz

SPEAKER_04 1:25

in New York City, Manhattan about 20 years, and have just submerged myself into the jazz community and the community that exists there. I am a touring, internationally touring musician. I have I'm about to, I have nine albums, um, seven of them in the classic American songbook. I have worked with incredible musicians like the late Russell Malone guitarist, Ron Carter, bassist, uh, Shedrick Mitchell, pianist, organist. Um it's my great delight to share music with the world. And um, I think what's really the most interesting kind of pivot turn in my career has been I have gone through a personal awakening within the last, I think, three to four years now. And how that has influenced my music and my approach to my music has been pretty profound. I have released an album called Awakening last year. And the way I received those songs was through dreams, through meditation. I hear lyrics, I hear melodies. And as a pianist, that's my first instrument, I go to the piano and I work through and I have these conversations with songs. And there's this objectivity that has given me such freedom and ability to express myself through the music. Takes me to my next album, This is Freedom, which is again an extension, a deeper reflection on what is it like to live a life when you decide that you're gonna start making your own rules, that you are going to start to dream big and dare to believe the things that you hear, that quiet voice that says, Can I do that? Should I do that? Oh gosh, I don't know if I want to do that. That's pretty scary. Um, so my music is a reflection of the, I would say, spiritual walk that I have been on. And of course, I still love the standards. I still go back to my Cole Porter, my George Gershren, my Miles Davis, John Coltrane. But at the same time, I infuse my original songwriting and my ability to heal through the frequency of music. That's in a nutshell of who I am and what motivates me.

SPEAKER_00 4:02

That's incredible. And oh my goodness. I I know it's hard to just capture everything in just a neat little sound bite, but I I feel like we're just getting the tip of the iceberg, and uh, you're unearthing some great things to to come. I mean, beyond the accomplished recording career, like nine albums, that's that's a a lifetime of music in itself.

SPEAKER_04 4:34

Yeah, it's blood, sweat, and tears.

SPEAKER_01 4:37

Yes. Lizzie, I'm I'm curious. Um, how has your music, the things you've written and produced, how has it been received?

SPEAKER_04 4:48

Well, really beautifully from those who have heard it. I think the biggest challenge of an independent artist is really having your music heard. Um, I was

Dream Songs And Healing Frequencies

SPEAKER_04 5:00

with a label, I left, I started my own label called Goddess Legacy Records. It's very specific to empowering female artists and female producers. So to really answer your question, people love the music. They can dig as deep into it as they want. The lyrics are very um engaging, compelling. Um, you can just listen to great music, or you can really dig deeper and go, whoa, these themes, where where is she going with this? Um, I have a lyric book as well that I've produced. So um it's it's an investigation that I could talk hours and hours and hours about, but I know that that's not what we're gonna do today.

SPEAKER_01 5:45

So it's it's thought provoking, is what I'm hearing.

SPEAKER_04 5:49

Yes. Yes. That's pretty much the origin, yeah. The original music is thought provoking and it's also always asking who are you? Are you living the life that you want? Are you living the life that you are here to live? Um, if you don't want to go there, you can just listen to the music because the music is infused with frequencies of healing. Because every one of these songs have been a process of healing for me to actually write them. Some of them come easily, some of them. I have one song that took me over a year to write. And it was a process of me understanding that no one was coming to save me. And guess who gets to save me?

SPEAKER_01 6:45

You do.

SPEAKER_04 6:46

I do.

SPEAKER_01 6:50

You know, you're going after a pretty specific niche, especially for the people that want more than just lyric. I mean, more than than music. Um, that thought-provoking thing. I mean, that is there, there is a literally a genre of people out there that I believe that will seek that out. They want to have that thought-provoking aspect of something in their life. We we recently discovered a playhouse that a lot of their plays that they produce are very intentionally set to really be thought-provoking for the audience. And and I'm I believe that's definitely a very specific niche. How do you how do you go about like reaching that niche?

SPEAKER_04 7:38

Do you have any suggestions?

SPEAKER_01 7:39

What shaver pronunciation?

SPEAKER_04 7:42

Help! I'm I'm raising the flag. Do you have any suggestions? I don't know, Maddox. It's it's um a lot of um that's one of the reasons why I'm talking to you guys today. One of the reasons why I'm here.

SPEAKER_01 7:59

The first thing that comes

Finding The Right Audience

SPEAKER_01 8:00

to my mind is um you have to educate that niche. You have to you or you have to educate the people about your music and say, you know, they need to hear from you. We talk about this a lot with creatives because we're so quick to put our art or our dance or whatever, our music out there. And sometimes we forget to put ourselves out there, which is what people are really hungry for. They want the person behind the music or behind the art or the, and and it's the the creatives community hasn't quite embraced that yet. I mean, what comes to my mind is you just simply producing short videos where you speak, a talking head video where you speak with your audience on varying different social media channels, telling them that your music was is you write your music for it to be thought-provoking, to make them go deep, to have them perhaps after listening to one of your songs, know themselves just a little bit better than they did before they listened.

SPEAKER_04 9:11

It's powerful, right?

SPEAKER_01 9:13

Yes, yes, but it is tricky reaching those people. But I think right now, more than ever, I mean, I have a love-hate relationship with social media, but we we have uh a means of reaching people across the entire globe that we never have had until now.

SPEAKER_04 9:31

Yeah, very true, Maddox, very true, and um yes, you are clarifying, confirming, mirroring back the very thing that I am doing, trying to do. As an artist, one thing that is is a real hard question to self is how public do I make my personal life as an artist? I'm a very private person. Yet I mentioned before, um, I have an objectivity an objective relationship with these songs because even though they're coming through my hand, through my being, there's a level of um third person objectivity that I have about them. And because of that, that for the first time as an artist has given me the ability to speak about them as if they're these entities that exist that aren't just about me. I I hope I'm being clear enough um in my explanation because with that being said, I can speak to certain songs and the journey and the motivation and my experience, but when you hear it, you might have a totally different experience. And I think as an artist, we have to allow the art to do as it wishes, the the creativity channel to to infuse itself and move through the listener, the one experiencing the art. So there's this perfect balance of me stepping out of the way, yet doing exactly what you just said, me also communicating my experience with the art. Because my experience with the art might help you experience the art in a different way.

SPEAKER_01 11:43

Exactly. Yes. You know,

Letting Listeners Define The Meaning

SPEAKER_01 11:45

the same is true of physical art, abstract painting. People see things in your painting that you didn't put in there. And it and it's their interpretation, and that's the beautiful part of it. Every person gets to have their own interpretation of each one of your songs.

SPEAKER_00 12:02

Right. And I imagine each performance is a kind of meditation. It's a it's a way that you get to revisit it and to have the audience to have their own unique experience in that moment.

SPEAKER_04 12:17

Yeah. Yeah, you bring up an interesting point as a performing artist. When I step on stage, I have to remember sometimes it's the first, second, third time that someone's heard a song. And the level of preparation and the level of intimacy that I have with the songs is probably out like hours and hours and hours. And um part of that is is really delightful. And also part of that is like I have to again step back and remember this is the first time that someone might be hearing this song ever. This is probably the hundredth or more time I've ever sung this song. So um you're right that people perceive the art and experience the art through their lens. And also, uh, you know, I can relate to when um, you know, when you hear like really successful artists say, I've sung that song 8,000 times and I'm so done doing it, but like we still want to hear it.

SPEAKER_01 13:31

You know, I I think, Lizzie, that awareness that you just spoke about, your awareness uh that you have your experience of it, but that they had their own interpretation, that's gonna work in your favor in a really, really big way.

SPEAKER_03 13:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:44

And I I feel like we are probably teasing a large section of our audience who aren't yet into your world. Because I mean, the beautiful thing about planting your your little stake in in history and and going on these podcasts is it's another point where people are able to see that you've planted your flag, they see your name, Lizzie Thomas, and they can plug it into their uh their podcast player, Spotify, Apple, what have you. And you've got a catalog. And they get to go on a journey. And uh having had that experience, I I was blown away because I was I was struck by a certain maturity and elegance because of your uh you've chosen to honor an art that is in a lot of ways uniquely American. And you it's not one of those things where you're just doing a cute lip service kind of thing to it. You embody it, and oh my goodness, does it come through?

SPEAKER_04 14:57

Thank you. Thank you very much. That means a lot to hear.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

So you spoke about the awakening. I want to go back and start there because I think that what you're tipping on is one of our pillars, which is becoming. As you begin to have the awakening, and

Awakening And The Integrity Gap

SPEAKER_01 15:30

these things begin to come to you in dreams and in meditation, it was lyrics, it was music that you could hear, the the keys being played on a piano, perhaps, that called you to step into a totally different level of who you are. You you were being called to become a different version of yourself, more of yourself, perhaps. Let's hear a little bit about that, how you experienced that, what it looked like, smelled like, tasted like, and and just how it impacted you.

SPEAKER_04 16:10

Yeah, there's a lot, a lot there, Maddox, and I will say yes, I am more of myself. I am a more authentic version of Lizzie today than I ever have been, even than I was yesterday. Yet I will say this. We'll call it becoming, we'll call it ascension, we'll call it recognition of self. Um I will say that there is a problem to ascension. And the problem that one has that I specifically had was I began realizing that what was happening internally was not being reflected externally. And I had to begin to look at all the relationships, all of my circumstances, all the choices that I had made that had led me to that place, and realized that a lot of them did not have the integrity of relationship with this newfound becoming and awakening that I was having within myself.

SPEAKER_01 17:33

Are are you saying they no longer served you?

SPEAKER_04 17:37

Yes, they no longer served me. They no longer, you know, I remember really coming having a conversation with the word integrity. And my understanding with integrity was one can one has integrity when internally the internal world is reflected in the external world. A lot of people say as below, as above, as above, as below. Um, there's a lot of different ways to say it. But I realized that I had conflict and I had to deal with it, and that was my responsibility. And what I mean by the conflict was a lot of my external world did not um represent this authentic version of myself. I was a people pleaser, I was um a self-abandoning wife. I was um there were a lot of things that I was not coming to relationship with in my external world that was reflecting my true authentic person. Does that make sense? Am I I mean I know I'm being clear, but am I sitting on something here?

SPEAKER_01 19:01

It makes perfect sense. You know, what's coming up for me right now in my experience, and and I want to know your take on this. I believe that there is a natural lag that happens when you go through an awakening or you embark on becoming more of who you really are. You make those changes internally, and for a period of time, no, the external world does not align. And you and you go through this, you know, kind of a WTF moment where you're wondering what's what's wrong here. But I think that it's just like anything else, you know, when when we no longer needed to shred raw meat off the bone, uh we we lost our jagged teeth, you know, that we we evolve. And there's a part of that that I think happens here that that it takes a little while for the external world to catch up with all the changes you've made internally, because it's waiting on you to take action on those internal shifts. And when you start to take action, and and based on what you're telling me, that meant you had to cut some people loose, cut some situations, cut some ways of doing things, some some limiting beliefs, perhaps.

SPEAKER_04 20:24

Not perhaps. Absolutely. I feel like I set fire to my entire life, which was me uncovering all of these limiting beliefs. And when I say limiting beliefs, what I'm speaking to are beliefs that I was taught through culture, through ancestry history, through religion, through this is just the way, through, you know, all the different things that I was taught. I started looking at it and going, do I believe that? And I just started writing down all the beliefs. And I became a curious explorer of my life. Do I believe that? Uh, I don't know. Let's put that one on the shelf. I'm not sure if I believe that.

SPEAKER_01 21:13

This is so rich. What you're describing now is so rich, and I hope the listeners are really tuning in because what you're telling me you did with writing down all of those beliefs to look at, well, is that true? Do I believe that is brilliant?

SPEAKER_00 21:29

Yeah, it's the most essential me search.

SPEAKER_04 21:33

Oh, I like that. Me search, yes.

SPEAKER_01 21:35

Instead of research, that's cute, right? I like that. It's the first time I've heard him say that.

SPEAKER_04 21:41

So I went through this process, and I'll tell you guys, the process is long because once you uncover one belief that you don't believe, what happens? Another one pops up.

SPEAKER_01 21:52

It's a domino effect.

SPEAKER_04 21:54

Absolutely, and then pretty soon you're left with Oh my gosh, I don't know what I believe. And then you start. What do you do? You tune in to yourself again. Then you you you begin to restructure, build. And that is my word right now. I am building. I am believing. And I love to say, I'm daring to believe. I'm daring to believe that I am all these things that I believe that I am. And that I believe spirit, universe, God, goddess says that I am. Because the reality is I still don't see it. You were talking about lag time. I still don't see all those things in my external world that I am living in today. Funny story. I just bought, I just completely changed my life. And I think I I want to bring it up because you can. You know, we are taught from early on. You do this and this and the ladder. You know, you're climbing the ladder and you get to the top at some point. I don't know what happens. Do you fly away? Or do

Burning The Ladder And Starting Over

SPEAKER_04 23:10

you just like look at my kingdom on top of my ladder? I don't know. Well, I just burned the ladder basically. I just set a torch to it and I was like, I'm not doing the ladder thing. I believe that in any stage of our life, we can just totally restart. We can do over. Like, why not? So I am living in a home that as a woman is a very powerful moment for me in the middle of my life to buy a home all by myself, no cosigner, no masculine energy to support me in it. Um and there's nothing in my house. There's there's there's no furniture.

SPEAKER_01 24:04

You said something. Can I give can I have permission to please give you a perhaps a different perspective?

SPEAKER_04 24:12

I'd love it, yes.

SPEAKER_01 24:12

When when you said no masculine energy to support me, and I get exactly where you're coming from, because we do we do definitely think of masculinity as being men and feminity as being women. But the truth is you have both masculine and feminine energy within who you are, in your being. I wish that we had been smart enough to name those energies differently. It the whole thing would be different if we hadn't named them after a gender. That was that was a stupid move on our part. Bad move.

SPEAKER_04 24:54

Totally right, and I completely agree with you. Continue.

SPEAKER_01 24:57

You you have whatever masculine energy that you need inside of you. You know, that it was a big moment for when I realized that I had only been honoring one of the energies and hadn't been honoring the other one. And when I began to honor both of them, there was this integration that happened. And when the integration happened, suddenly my central nervous system just went peaceful. Something that had been fighting, and this just happened maybe five years ago. Um I had been fighting internally my whole life, masculine, feminine, masculine, feminine. They'd been fighting with each other. And one day I just sat down and decided to really figure it out.

SPEAKER_03 25:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:47

And I wrote, I wrote, I wrote, I wrote. And when I got finished, I wrote, read what I wrote. It was like I was channeling. And it was all about just this honoring of both, realizing that you have both, that those energies don't have anything to do with gender. Nothing. Those energies are in all of us, and when we can make peace with them, when we can, as a planet, as humanity, when we can individually make peace with those two energies inside of us, wars will stop. We we will have we will have peace planet-wide, not only internally for individually, but we'll have it externally as well. But you have everything you need inside of you.

SPEAKER_04 26:35

I know, isn't it so exciting? Why are we not taught that? We're taught to look outside of us for everything that we need.

SPEAKER_00 26:48

Well, we're taught to to have we're taught that we have needs that, you know, if if no one had ever polluted us to think that we needed to ascend the ladder and drive the fancy new car and get the big house and all those things, then you know there are there would be a lot of people that would be sorely disadvantaged because that's their dream. And in order for them to achieve what they want, we need to think that we need to pursue it too.

SPEAKER_04 27:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:19

Yeah, the American dream is a joke. It's a fluke.

SPEAKER_04 27:23

Totally.

SPEAKER_01 27:25

Like we just it's like we just pass it out at certain certain age. Well, you reach a certain age, and and you the your family, your people around you, they they give you the American dream. Yes, and it and it fucks us up in a way that's just like, wow.

Patriarchy Talk And Kingdoms Fall

SPEAKER_04 27:40

It's the great lie.

SPEAKER_01 27:41

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 27:42

It's the great lie that keeps us in cages, that keeps us enslaved. And I'm so glad that I said what I said the way I did, Maddox, for you to speak to the feminine and masculine energy because it's so important and it inhabits uh it inhabits us. And we must have the balance of the two. So I'm gonna um ask for the ability to edit what I said.

SPEAKER_01 28:13

You know, you you exhibit both. You do know that, right?

SPEAKER_04 28:16

I do, you know.

SPEAKER_01 28:17

Outwardly, I can I can see it. Visually, you're exceptionally feminine. For those that are not seeing video here and having the audio, she's dressed to the teeth, her makeup is flawless, her hair is beautiful, the jewelry, the whole and the house behind you, there's this bright section behind you. There's a hot pink wall and a blue sofa. It's like, oh my god, can I come live with you? It's it's just fabulous. But there's a lot of feminine energy visually, but also just you can just feel the energy. But then on the other hand, you're a tiger by the tail.

SPEAKER_04 28:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:56

Doesn't take but two minutes to figure that out, if even that long.

SPEAKER_04 29:01

Yes. You know, it's interesting, uh, Maddox. I've worked a lot on embodying my feminine energy because as a woman brought up in this very and also in jazz as a musician, I'm surrounded by men always. I am in a male-dominated genre, field of music. And so uh as a teacher, as an um entrepreneur, I've learned that I have to speak very clearly, I have to say what I mean, mean what I say, not be afraid to speak, and be very um not domineering, because I don't think I'm domineering. I just think I'm very clear at my direct assertive.

SPEAKER_01 29:47

You're assertive, and I'm assertive.

SPEAKER_04 29:48

And I've had to be um so I appreciate um I I I appreciate you and um your assessment. Thank you. So my edit is I did not have a male escort, a male beside me to a male representative to buy my home. And that was a big deal. And then and that's um that was something that throughout my especially being brought up in the South. I mean, I was a debutante, I was in pageants, I was always brought up beside a male, and I want to say beside because I'm I want to focus on that, but most of the time the male's in front in that society, and it is true. And they make us think that, oh well, you know, he's helping us embody our feminine energy. Well, it's bullshit.

SPEAKER_01 30:48

So I I agree. I I I'm I'm totally against the patriarch. I think it is it it is what it is the biggest thing that keeps us from having what we would all really love and enjoy. It it it's it's it's it's bad, it's bad. It's just bad. There's no two ways about it.

SPEAKER_04 31:11

Agreed. Agreed.

SPEAKER_01 31:13

And it's even bad for men, you know?

unknown 31:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:16

The patriarch, if you really do the math and look at the statistics, it it's killing us. Living up to that that thing that we're taught, it it's killing us.

SPEAKER_04 31:28

I completely agree.

SPEAKER_01 31:31

So if you wanted if you wanted to sum up. Oh, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead.

SPEAKER_04 31:35

Like, so what do we do? We just keep living our authentic lives, right? I keep making music, I I keep communicating this message, I keep sharing uh the wisdom that I have. What what what do you think we do, Maddox? What do you think?

SPEAKER_01 31:50

Oh, I I think you know, you're impairing you're empowering women. I think that's really, really important.

unknown 31:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:58

Um, Dwight, you take a stab.

SPEAKER_00 32:00

Yeah, I I think that as long as you continue to be true to yourself, you as long as you continue to produce the beautiful music that you do, to speak out in the way that you do, it's setting up a beacon for others who might not even know that they're that this is a possible way of being. I I think that it just like when you bang a tuning fork and there's another one that resonates at the same frequency that knows that it has permission to sing, you're lighting that path. And the the best that we can hope for is that as you continue to show what it is to to live live out your genuine way of being, it's gonna give others permission. Bingo.

SPEAKER_01 32:52

Well said, Dwight. Well said, very well said. You know, my my hope is that sooner or later the patriarch will just die off. That that we're slowly the younger generations are are not sucked into that as much as they used to be.

SPEAKER_00 33:12

Yeah, unf unfortunately, it's it's too easy to trade in greed and fear, and that's what perpetuates it.

SPEAKER_04 33:21

Yes. And I think eventually what will happen is we as awakened people who desire more, who see the truth of the puritanical patriarchy, will continue to rise and realize that we have no use for it, and eventually it it will have no use and it will crumble. I have a song called Kingdoms Fall, and it speaks to this. It speaks to the crumbling patriarchy, but it doesn't speak to the patriarchy, it speaks to when we become authentically ourselves, it just becomes obsolete. It's not something we even care about anymore. Like it's we disregard it. And in it not being important, it's where it begins to fall and lose its power.

SPEAKER_01 34:23

I love that. Love, love, love that. Yeah. So so I think we've we've done a really good job of covering the whole becoming thing. I think your story is like all about becoming. But let's touch a little bit on community and how that's played a role in all of the things that you've achieved, the awakening. How did how did community play a role in that?

SPEAKER_04 34:48

Um, well, I can't help but say I wrote a song, and the title is community, and that was the first song I ever heard from Spirit.

Community And Creative Collaboration

SPEAKER_04 35:01

And the lyrics are community, you and me. Don't forget that we are free. I believe we'll come together in time. And it is a song that speaks to, and there's a beautiful music video set in Manhattan, and it speaks to um we all are different, we all look different, we come from different backgrounds. I celebrate difference. I'm a xenophile, and I think that in celebrating difference, we actually honor it. And um, that's what this song, a community, is about. So big believer in the fact that we can't do this on our own. Uh, my band, they're very important to me. My female friends are very important to me. Um, I have had to learn as a very independent woman who is an airy son. I usually get shit done faster than anybody else in my world. But you know what? I'm alone. I get it done faster, but I'm alone. Is that serving me? Sometimes not. I mean, I got the task, I can check it off, but I'm alone. And the value of community is incredibly important, not only as a person, but as a musician. I can't, I mean, I can sit behind the piano and play my songs and sing. But how much more powerful it is when I have my band with me and we're all passionately, emotionally expressing our love of the music. I mean, that's powerful. That's where things are really accomplished.

SPEAKER_01 36:47

That's beautiful. So speak a little bit more about in that awareness that I can get shit done really fast by myself, but is that really serving me? How how how have things shifted in that awareness?

SPEAKER_04 37:04

Well, that awareness came a couple of years ago. Um, and how you know, I am not a patient person, but I think I've actually become a pretty fairly patient person over the last several years. Um, and it's also made me become um more of a clear communicator that speaks to deadlines, that speaks to this is what we, you know, as an entrepreneur, a musical entrepreneur. I have my own record label, I'm my own artist. I have a team of people that's very, very small. But it's helped me realize that I'm better when I have people around me because I'm not the expert in everything. I mean, that's ridiculous. Um, so I'm better when I have people around me because I have to understand what it is that I need, what I want, who I am, and how I communicate getting the job done. That's business on a personal level. Um, I'm an empath. And so I love being around people and I enjoy the stories and and enjoy the experience of sharing life. So that's really it for me. I'm I'm in it, but if you're in it by yourself, then what's I don't know, what's really the point?

SPEAKER_00 38:38

I that seems like a a great callback to how you got off the ladder.

SPEAKER_04 38:45

Exactly. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 38:51

You know, I there's this, I don't know where this happens for everybody, but there was a point in my life, and I can't pinpoint exactly when it was, but it's been a few years ago, when I realized that aside from oxygen, water, and food, one of my greatest resources are my relationships.

SPEAKER_03 39:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:13

I mean, literally right

Grief As A Teacher

SPEAKER_01 39:15

up there in that spot number four after those three, you know, life-sustaining necessities.

SPEAKER_00 39:23

Yeah, and I I wouldn't argue that I reached a point. Uh unfortunately, grief caused me to mature in in ways that I I never could have imagined. And I realized that the relationships are the point.

SPEAKER_04 39:42

Yeah. Yeah, I I like to say grief is my friend because I too have had a long, long relationship with grief. And it makes us uh it chisels us, it softens us, it defines us, it refines us. So I'm I'm not afraid when I have a friend that's in need or when I have a friend that's grieving. Um, I find it very comfortable to be there with them and know that I don't have to do anything, but just be present with them. And that's that's all that's required.

SPEAKER_01 40:23

You know, we we tend to think of grief as like a really bad loss. Somebody died or somebody pulled the plug and walked away, or but I had a huge awareness. It's been now a couple of years ago, that grief happens to us in small ways all day, every day. You know, you you go to your favorite restaurant and sit down, and you can't wait to order your favorite item on the menu, and the chef comes and or the wait person comes and says, I'm sorry, we're out of that today. And in that moment, you you literally experience it is a form of grief. It's not like somebody just died. Well, for some of us it is, but but we we do anytime we get disappointed, whether it's some somebody has disappointed or something has disappointed, something didn't go the way we really wanted it to go, we experience uh some form of grief. Yeah, it's all around us.

SPEAKER_04 41:32

Yeah, it is. I think that that's been my lesson in being present, not being afraid to experience all the emotions that move through me all day long, and as an emotional, um, and I say emotional with love because we've also thought of emotional as bad or toxic or but as an emotionally evolved person, um it's one a challenge to navigate through that. Um, but once you learn how to do it, it becomes a really rich, present life and being able to be there for the relationships in my life. You know, I will say um I experience all emotions pretty frequently throughout a day.

SPEAKER_01 42:32

I can write my hand there. I I'm not too. We're both deeply feeling human beings, and we're not afraid of our feelings. So we're pretty good about feeling them, pretty good about expressing them.

SPEAKER_00 42:46

You're better than I am. Yeah, you can read mine before I can read my own. And that's okay.

SPEAKER_01 42:54

I'm an empath too.

SPEAKER_04 42:56

Yeah. I like that term deeply feeling. I'm gonna use that instead of emotional, deeply feeling. I like that.

SPEAKER_01 43:07

Yeah, it it it does. It has a little different context to it than emotional. Yes, I'm I'm a very emotional man, but what's underneath that, what creates that emotion, is my ability to deeply feel.

SPEAKER_02 43:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 43:34

This has been an amazing and far-ranging conversation, and we've covered a lot of amazing topics. Uh is there anything that you would like to share with our listeners?

SPEAKER_04 43:51

I would be amiss to to not give them the way to get in touch with me. And that is Lizzie L-I-Z-Z-I-E the jazzsinger.com. All my socials, Lizzie the Jazz Singer. My name is Lizzie Thomas, but sometimes it's easier to remember. Oh, wait a minute, Lizzie the Jazz Singer. Because I want to hear, you know, I love getting

How To Connect With Lizzie

SPEAKER_04 44:15

random emails and and DMs and my Instagram. I'm I'm still that person that looks at it and I respond and connect.

SPEAKER_01 44:24

So well, just so the listeners know, that web address will be in the show notes. Um on our website, when you visit uh the episode there, there it will be a detailed profile on Lizzie with a photo and a bio and all of her socials, everything you want to know except for her personal contact information. But you can go to her socials and certainly uh contact her through there. And she's just invited you to do that. So what a beautiful thing.

SPEAKER_00 45:00

Well, and and don't sleep on the chance to to hear something really magical. If you go and seek her out on on Spotify or your your music service of choice, you you won't be disappointed because there's so much that is just just product that's out there. Listen to something with some soul.

SPEAKER_04 45:21

Yeah, thanks. Thanks, you guys.

SPEAKER_00 45:24

Lizzie, this has been delightful.

SPEAKER_04 45:26

Yeah, I agree. Thank you, Maddox. Thank you, Dwight.