March 23, 2026

#067: The Connection Between Sexual Energy and Creativity With Myola Woods

What actually fuels creativity? Most of us think creativity lives in the mind… an idea, a talent, or a skill we develop. But what if creativity comes from somewhere deeper? Something that moves through the body… through emotion… through the very life force that animates us. In this episode, Maddox and Dwight sit down with Australian educator and facilitator Myola Woods to explore a topic many creatives sense but rarely talk about openly… the connection between sexual energy and creative energ...

What actually fuels creativity?

Most of us think creativity lives in the mind… an idea, a talent, or a skill we develop. But what if creativity comes from somewhere deeper? Something that moves through the body… through emotion… through the very life force that animates us.

In this episode, Maddox and Dwight sit down with Australian educator and facilitator Myola Woods to explore a topic many creatives sense but rarely talk about openly… the connection between sexual energy and creative energy.

Myola shares her personal journey of discovering how sexuality, trauma, creativity, and authentic self-expression are deeply intertwined. At the heart of the conversation is a simple but powerful idea… the same life force that creates life is also the energy that fuels imagination, expression, and creative courage.

Together they explore how cultural conditioning often disconnects us from that vital energy… and how reconnecting with the body can awaken creativity in powerful ways.

This isn’t a conversation about technique or productivity… it’s about rediscovering the creative life force that has always been inside us.

Myola's Profile
Myola's Website

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00:00 - Cold Open On Shame And Healing

03:08 - Sexual Energy As Life Force

06:33 - Fixing Sex Ed With Curiosity

15:33 - Trauma Spirituality And Finding Pleasure

26:13 - Safety Boundaries In Erotic Community

36:28 - Religion Nudity And The Roots Of Shame

51:08 - Sex Magic Intention And Manifestation

01:01:18 - Making Love To Yourself On Purpose

01:04:58 - Becoming Resilient Learning To Receive Support

WEBVTT

00:00:34.310 --> 00:00:41.590
And certainly, you know, most of our shame happened in community.

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So the opposite needs to happen for us to heal, it often needs to happen in community as well.

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Hello, community.

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You're here with Dwight and Maddox, your hosts.

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This is For the Love of Creatives podcast.

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And today our featured guest is Myola Woods.

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Welcome, Mayola.

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Thank you.

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Glad to have you, Myola.

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Today we're going to have, I think, a very interesting conversation, and we've been very excited about this.

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I'm going to turn it over to Myola for a moment and give her just a moment or two to tell you guys who she is and what she's about, and then we'll go from there.

00:01:30.789 --> 00:01:31.269
Thank you.

00:01:31.429 --> 00:01:33.590
So it's my pleasure to be here.

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There's just find I listen to a few of your podcasts, and they're just amazing how you bring out creative spirit.

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And I just thrilled about me.

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So, you know, if you haven't worked out, I live, I'm an Australian, and that's where the accent comes from.

00:01:52.869 --> 00:02:08.789
And I really have been on a journey of self-discovery with myself and how, you know, sexuality, how our sexual energy works, how trauma impacts that, what our history does.

00:02:09.030 --> 00:02:23.030
I have been on a very large discovery over time, how to work out how it is that I can be my best authentic creative self and how and how to teach that to others.

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And it hasn't always been a very smooth journey.

00:02:26.229 --> 00:02:46.310
There's lots of hiccups and rides and roller coasters and and um but one of the things that I love to do is bring is show people how to use their creativity, how to use their sexual energy to bring more in their life to enhance their creativity, to enhance their their love.

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I love this.

00:02:58.229 --> 00:03:05.349
And and we don't realize how sexual energy is it's the qi, it's the prana, it's all those other things that you can call it.

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It is our life force.

00:03:08.069 --> 00:03:12.069
And you can use it for anything you want, not just sex, right?

00:03:13.030 --> 00:03:13.669
Absolutely.

00:03:13.909 --> 00:03:14.469
Absolutely.

00:03:14.549 --> 00:03:17.189
We have very, I think we have a very narrow opinion.

00:03:17.270 --> 00:03:27.750
I mean, I'm not sure what the sex education in the States is like, but here in Australia, we focus in high school, we focus very much on, you know, don't get pregnant, don't get a disease.

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That's the that's the that's the scope.

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Contraception is absolutely same here.

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So there's no scope.

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And I think, you know, we miss a really big opportunity with young people that they could be curious, that we've got a whole body to explore.

00:03:46.229 --> 00:03:54.710
There's a whole body of um curiosity and pleasure, and we just narrow it down to putting, you know, genitals together.

00:03:54.870 --> 00:03:58.069
That's a very, it's a very narrow point of view.

00:03:58.310 --> 00:04:05.669
Well, I you know, I can't speak to other cultures, but in the United States, we just it's a top, it's a taboo topic, basically.

00:04:05.909 --> 00:04:10.629
I mean, most of us reached puberty between 10 and 12.

00:04:10.789 --> 00:04:16.069
My father waited till I was 16 to have the birds and bees conversation with me.

00:04:16.310 --> 00:04:22.069
And then all he had to say was, Well, you know, your older brother got pregnant when he was your age, and you don't want that to happen.

00:04:22.230 --> 00:04:23.590
He got his wife, his girlfriend pregnant.

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You don't want that to happen to you, so you need to wear what condoms.

00:04:27.030 --> 00:04:30.629
That was the whole birds and bees conversation right there.

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And he waited till I was 16.

00:04:34.710 --> 00:04:36.389
Yeah, that's way too late, isn't it?

00:04:36.550 --> 00:04:37.430
I mean, and this is the thing.

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I mean, we focus on contraception, whereas if we from a young age, you know, as appropriate, if we, you know, said to people that, you know, you can have an orgasm touching your knee and you know, exploring, you know, your elbow, that would give teenagers a wider range to explore than you know, it's kind of taught this is what you need to do, and you and you need to do it quickly and you need to do it soon.

00:05:04.470 --> 00:05:07.350
Um otherwise you're out of the click.

00:05:07.750 --> 00:05:09.830
Yeah, and you need to feel bad about it.

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Right?

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You you gotta have guilt and shame, or you know, or else it doesn't count.

00:05:14.630 --> 00:05:17.270
Um I'm not a parrot in this lifetime.

00:05:17.590 --> 00:05:29.030
And um I but I do know that if I were a parent, that whole sex conversation would have happened before they reached puberty.

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Because when the hormones rage suddenly and you don't even know what's happening to you and you're not prepared, my God, that is so unfair to children.

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And yet we don't we we don't prepare them in any way.

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We don't prepare women for menstrual cycles, for God's sake.

00:05:47.830 --> 00:05:51.430
No, no, we there is not a lot of preparation going on.

00:05:51.670 --> 00:05:57.510
No, one day you think you're dying because you're bleeding and you don't have any idea that that's normal and natural.

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Oh, I've heard those stories until I'm blue.

00:06:00.630 --> 00:06:03.750
Yes, yes, yes, there's lots of those stories.

00:06:04.070 --> 00:06:09.990
And in saying that, people generally then people with vulvas don't understand their anatomy very well.

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Right.

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They don't know where things come from, they don't understand how pleasure works very well at all.

00:06:17.670 --> 00:06:21.110
It's yes, yes, that that conversation.

00:06:21.270 --> 00:06:27.189
I mean, in my house, I have four grown children now, like they're between 19 and 27 or something.

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And we had those sorts of conversations young.

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I mean, not in detail, because you know, no matter what job you have or whatever, you still don't want to think about your parents, you know, having pleasure or sex or any of those things.

00:06:42.070 --> 00:06:43.110
It's still an ooh.

00:06:43.590 --> 00:06:46.070
Which is whole jacked up to do, didn't it?

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That's jacked up.

00:06:48.950 --> 00:06:49.510
That's right.

00:06:50.150 --> 00:06:54.310
So, but I, you know, we had conversations and as they grew, I left things around.

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People said to me, just leave things around and they will look at them for themselves.

00:07:01.670 --> 00:07:13.189
And I think that my children's friends always liked coming to their weird mum's house because we had, you know, pictures of nudity, and um, there were books on the shelf that were a bit, you know.

00:07:13.350 --> 00:07:18.070
And I would come home sometimes and the books would be moved, and I would think that's that's really good.

00:07:18.230 --> 00:07:26.070
They're having conversations that are different than oh, you know, I need to be scared and it's frightening, and what do I do?

00:07:26.230 --> 00:07:29.350
There's there's that's a much we had a much open house.

00:07:29.430 --> 00:07:37.910
I'm not saying that we didn't have that we couldn't have improved or whatever, but it was much different to how you know I grew up or how lots of people grew up.

00:07:38.870 --> 00:07:46.870
Well, speaking of how how you grew up, I I would love to know a little bit of how you got put on this journey.

00:07:47.990 --> 00:07:49.189
How I got put on this journey.

00:07:49.270 --> 00:07:49.830
Thank you, Dwight.

00:07:49.990 --> 00:07:51.350
It's a great question.

00:07:51.590 --> 00:08:15.189
Um, I got here, I have a you know, I have an Irish, you know, background, so I guess we just inherently have um a nervous system that attracts trauma and a nervous system that likes that feels comfortable in chaos and feels comfortable in you know that's not saying things and having things hidden.

00:08:15.270 --> 00:08:22.070
So I grew up in a in a place that was, I think, for a child, a bit difficult.

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I had to kind of know what was going on and had to understand the nuances of things way too early, which is amazing for me now.

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But at the time I think it was a bit tricky.

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And what I always was curious about was how how could I be better and how I I I guess I felt like in this environment, I felt like there was something wrong with me rather than maybe maybe it was then that kind of be could have been tweaked a little bit better, but maybe I think I took it a bit, I think I took it a bit personally.

00:08:52.309 --> 00:08:57.589
So I've always it was, you know, I suppose that started, and I had a very spiritual connection.

00:08:58.069 --> 00:09:09.750
I had was either we went, I wouldn't have said we were particularly religious, but we we did, we had an influence from church, and I got to spend some time with some nuns.

00:09:09.909 --> 00:09:16.949
So I had a very spiritual um part of me that was different to just going to church.

00:09:17.110 --> 00:09:29.350
And then as I grew, I you know, I went into yoga, I went into more spiritual, and I suppose that was also a way to be able to find answers in what how I grew up.

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Like so to find answers so you can kind of spiritualize things to find answers and find growth and improve.

00:09:37.110 --> 00:09:47.269
And then I kind of worked out, I did lots of body work then, lots of massage, lots of body work, lots of getting into my pelvis, into my body, into here.

00:09:47.589 --> 00:09:54.870
And I found that I couldn't, I didn't really, I wasn't really be able to express myself with a partner very well.

00:09:55.110 --> 00:10:00.629
I was okay on my own, but I wasn't, I didn't, yeah, I didn't orgasm very well with a partner.

00:10:01.429 --> 00:10:04.629
And so I thought there's something not quite right here.

00:10:04.709 --> 00:10:07.829
I can go and have yeah, I can have experiences on my own.

00:10:08.069 --> 00:10:11.909
Now we would call it, we have words for it, we would call it eco-sexuality.

00:10:12.789 --> 00:10:16.469
I love how, you know, as things grow, they get names.

00:10:16.629 --> 00:10:20.149
They get it.

00:10:20.309 --> 00:10:28.629
Um whereas you know, I was communing with God and the I was communing with God and the nature and the trees and the birds.

00:10:28.789 --> 00:10:33.110
I was and so I kind of realized this is not quite right.

00:10:33.350 --> 00:10:34.789
I mean, it's amazing.

00:10:35.110 --> 00:10:44.789
But since I'm a human here on earth, I need to I need to be able to work this into being able to have this experience with humans, have this experience here on earth with people.

00:10:45.669 --> 00:10:53.589
And that I think it was the turning point of m working with that pleasure for here on earth.

00:10:53.909 --> 00:11:03.350
You know, I I think there's a little bit of a theme unfolding here I'm seeing, and and that is, you know, we talked about how sexual energy is life force.

00:11:03.509 --> 00:11:04.789
It's just energy.

00:11:05.350 --> 00:11:08.629
And we know that art is life and life is art.

00:11:08.789 --> 00:11:10.069
They're they're one and the same.

00:11:10.149 --> 00:11:11.669
You can't separate them.

00:11:12.069 --> 00:11:27.429
But I'm also feeling this sense that we are spiritual creatures, whether we know it or not, whether we consciously say it or or practice it, you can't separate spirit from life or life from spirit.

00:11:27.509 --> 00:11:29.750
And that's totally separate from religion.

00:11:30.709 --> 00:11:32.469
Religion's kind of something else.

00:11:32.629 --> 00:11:44.309
Not to make it wrong or anything, but spirituality is it it is an overarching thing that religions fall under it in some shape, form, or fashion.

00:11:44.469 --> 00:11:49.990
It's not either spirituality or religion, the way people tend to do that or you.

00:11:50.469 --> 00:11:51.750
Yeah, I don't believe that.

00:11:51.909 --> 00:11:55.269
I think that life is spirituality.

00:11:55.350 --> 00:12:00.469
And so that's come across all these different, you know, it's it's a unified thing.

00:12:00.629 --> 00:12:04.230
I I see that and and I hear that in what you're saying.

00:12:05.029 --> 00:12:11.669
I'm curious to know you certainly weren't raised the way you raised your children.

00:12:11.909 --> 00:12:17.029
How did you come by knowing that something needed to be different?

00:12:17.269 --> 00:12:24.149
And and how did you step into probably the courage that it perhaps took to do it differently?

00:12:24.469 --> 00:12:30.949
Because sex is a pretty scary topic sometimes for a lot of people.

00:12:32.629 --> 00:12:34.709
Yeah, it can be scary, can't it?

00:12:34.949 --> 00:12:42.949
Um I you know, I think I just wanted something different, and I followed the breadcrumbs.

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I think how I don't know, that's often been my life that there's there's breadcrumbs to to follow.

00:12:49.669 --> 00:13:02.549
And I I you know I had good mentors um about with the spirituality, and I had you know some really deep, deep people around.

00:13:02.709 --> 00:13:07.829
I don't know, I don't know how I came across them, but I I I obviously was seeking.

00:13:08.469 --> 00:13:19.509
Um I think I just fell into the right things at the right time to help me grow, and then to know that if I wanted to create something different here, I needed to be different.

00:13:19.589 --> 00:13:23.669
And the way that I brought my children up needed to be different.

00:13:23.829 --> 00:13:25.669
And no, it wasn't always easy.

00:13:25.829 --> 00:13:29.110
And um it was swimming against the current.

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That's okay.

00:13:29.909 --> 00:13:30.549
That's okay.

00:13:30.709 --> 00:13:31.829
Yeah, that's that's okay.

00:13:31.990 --> 00:13:47.189
It doesn't yeah, I don't I've not really thought it needs to be easy, it needs to be better, it needs to be what else, and all and had the curiosity, and yeah, and that's not to say everything turned out perfectly by a long shot, or that everything was smooth.

00:13:47.429 --> 00:13:56.230
You just kind of worked on the things that were in place in the beginning um to create something different.

00:13:56.389 --> 00:13:59.110
When we went to a Steiner school, we went, we did lots of different things.

00:13:59.269 --> 00:14:06.789
We we went to different like education was was was important for me, for them to have something.

00:14:07.029 --> 00:14:08.709
And that always didn't go smooth.

00:14:08.870 --> 00:14:17.909
But then you get a bunch of, you know, the idea is, you know, you get a a bunch of conscious people or a bunch of people who think differently together and things will go smoothly.

00:14:18.069 --> 00:14:19.990
It's not been my experience ever.

00:14:20.549 --> 00:14:33.589
The more people um, you know, have different thoughts, then you, you know, you don't only have one me to deal with, you now have 20 or 30 people that you're trying to wrangle into something and everyone's got a totally different.

00:14:34.230 --> 00:15:02.629
So that's also been my lesson in community, is how you know they say you know, if you want to go fast, go along, and if you want to go far, take your community, and to how to bring everyone into some sort of way that we can go together, particularly when people have such um distinct uh thoughts and distinct ways of being that they want to how to wrangle that so the whole community can go forward and the whole community can collaborate together.

00:15:02.789 --> 00:15:10.629
That has been that has been a big part of my journey as well, is bringing those, bringing that harnessing that energy together.

00:15:11.750 --> 00:15:12.389
Yeah.

00:15:13.189 --> 00:15:14.309
How did you do that?

00:15:14.469 --> 00:15:18.149
How did you bring people into community around sexual energy?

00:15:21.429 --> 00:15:22.069
Well, yeah.

00:15:22.149 --> 00:15:27.589
I mean I I have been lucky to have been with some good people to set.

00:15:28.469 --> 00:15:48.870
I mean the sexuality world in general is filled with all sorts of um beings and lots of like all industries I suppose, but the sexuality industry is a bit a bit more if something goes wrong it it has I think it has a bigger impact.

00:15:49.429 --> 00:15:56.629
And certainly, you know, most of our shame happened in community.

00:15:57.110 --> 00:16:02.549
So the opposite needs to happen for us to heal, it often needs to happen in community as well.

00:16:03.110 --> 00:16:17.350
So I've had some really good role models and some really good people who I've had some real really good role models of what not to do as well, like not to like there can be a real big power dynamic and there can be um things happen, you know.

00:16:17.429 --> 00:16:35.350
I mean just generally speaking, I'm gonna put a little pin here, but generally speaking, I don't know about you two, but you know, even when I have lots of skills, but even when I'm aroused, my brain is not what thinking uh rationally or doesn't have the communication skills that it does when it's when it's calm.

00:16:36.069 --> 00:16:49.429
So when you heighten that into being aroused in a sexual space, you know, you there needs to be some really clear, really amazing boundaries in place and places where people can bring everything.

00:16:49.669 --> 00:16:59.350
People can bring their past um you know, triggers, bring things into the future, bring you know, everything can be welcome, not just the orgasmic stuff.

00:16:59.509 --> 00:17:03.350
Because often when we're working with the orgasmic stuff, everything else comes up in between.

00:17:03.990 --> 00:17:09.750
So bringing that community in safety means, you know, for me, means everything's welcome.

00:17:10.069 --> 00:17:18.470
And we stay non-judgmental, we stay like a tree, you know, has seen everything, but you know, nothing kind of kind of takes it on.

00:17:18.630 --> 00:17:23.269
And we be there for each other regardless of what's what's happening.

00:17:23.509 --> 00:17:29.830
Um we come back to that community, we come back to that whole, and that's not always easy.

00:17:30.630 --> 00:17:36.550
And keep coming back to that that creation, like what what got us here?

00:17:37.029 --> 00:17:38.550
And what do we want to do?

00:17:38.790 --> 00:17:49.350
Because everything in the middle is in the way of all of the pieces are in the way of what we want to create in the world, what we want to be in the world, how we want to have our community.

00:17:49.750 --> 00:18:00.550
So there's lots of you know, talks, lots of safety, lots of embodiment practices, lots of working through shame in public places in a really safe way.

00:18:00.710 --> 00:18:03.910
Like I'm not suggesting we go to the supermarket and do that on that.

00:18:04.470 --> 00:18:04.710
Sure.

00:18:04.950 --> 00:18:14.790
Okay, that's the second time you've mentioned shame, and I want to kind of focus on that for a minute because I you know, this is just me, but I want your take.

00:18:14.950 --> 00:18:22.230
I kind of feel like, of course, there's no question there's an insane amount of of shame for most people around sex.

00:18:23.190 --> 00:18:26.310
But what's the origin of that shame?

00:18:26.550 --> 00:18:30.470
I I kind of feel like that it's religiously based.

00:18:31.670 --> 00:18:32.470
Most of it.

00:18:33.590 --> 00:18:33.990
Yeah.

00:18:34.150 --> 00:18:45.590
I I I I I think that you know, when Dwight spoke about it being, you know, you needed to needed to be awful in some aspect, you needed to have guilt, you needed to have, I think that's that's key.

00:18:45.670 --> 00:18:49.430
And if we if I mean there are probably many reasons that we have shame.

00:18:50.550 --> 00:18:53.190
Um, but I think really religion is one of them.

00:18:53.269 --> 00:19:02.950
I mean, you know, we're taught, I mean, do if you go to any sort of religion, you're taught that, or most religions, that you know, we got kicked out of the Garden of Eden because we were naughty.

00:19:03.110 --> 00:19:07.830
Um, and then we had to put clothes on, and then we had to to do things.

00:19:08.070 --> 00:19:14.710
So um I think yes, it it's there is a a a way for it to stem back.

00:19:15.750 --> 00:19:19.910
So very, very yes, that I was really blessed in that department.

00:19:19.990 --> 00:19:24.870
I was not raised in a household that preached shame about sex.

00:19:26.150 --> 00:19:34.390
We went to church on Sundays until I was maybe about 11 years old, and then there were some dynamics in the family that changed, and we stopped going to church.

00:19:34.550 --> 00:19:37.509
I was ever so grateful because it was not my thing.

00:19:37.670 --> 00:19:45.990
You know, I can remember sitting in the pew in a very, very young age and hearing the preacher say, you know, you're all sinners.

00:19:46.310 --> 00:19:51.509
And the little boy, I was the little boy at the time, so it wasn't the inner little boy, it was just me.

00:19:51.670 --> 00:19:56.550
I didn't do this outside, but on the inside, I was going, uh-uh.

00:19:57.110 --> 00:19:58.230
I didn't believe that.

00:19:58.470 --> 00:20:00.070
I just didn't believe that.

00:20:00.630 --> 00:20:04.950
My family never ever talked about sex in a shameful way.

00:20:05.110 --> 00:20:08.070
It was a normal, healthy part of life.

00:20:08.310 --> 00:20:19.509
I mean, they didn't run around naked or fornicate in front of us or anything like that, but it was just a a normal, natural thing that people did.

00:20:20.070 --> 00:20:25.990
There was and so I didn't I didn't get that shame, not religiously and and not in the home.

00:20:26.230 --> 00:20:35.509
And I can tell you, man, uh I look around me and I I can't relate to a lot of the sexual shame that I hear people talk about.

00:20:35.670 --> 00:20:36.870
It's just not my experience.

00:20:37.029 --> 00:20:37.509
Yeah, yeah.

00:20:38.070 --> 00:20:38.390
Yeah.

00:20:38.790 --> 00:20:43.430
I was just gonna ask you, how do you think, how do you think growing up in that environment changed?

00:20:43.590 --> 00:20:45.750
I mean, because you see lots and lots of other people.

00:20:45.990 --> 00:20:51.750
So one of the things you don't have is you don't you you don't resonate, you don't understand, you don't resonate with that shame.

00:20:51.910 --> 00:21:08.310
Do you think that it changed anything else in the way that you behave or the way that you I would venture to say that poured over into perhaps every area of my life because shame is so rooted in in sex and then it pours out of there and goes into other things.

00:21:08.390 --> 00:21:15.430
And so I have never been a person that I I don't just experience much shame.

00:21:15.590 --> 00:21:18.870
I experience a little bit of embarrassment from time to time.

00:21:19.190 --> 00:21:23.750
Okay, but that's a different energy than than shame.

00:21:24.390 --> 00:21:38.390
Yeah, I I often have to be reminded of how people have boundaries that that's set by whatever whatever it was that formed them, you know, whatever Victorian values they cling to.

00:21:38.870 --> 00:21:42.070
Because in a lot of ways, I've had to just be practical.

00:21:42.230 --> 00:21:58.950
When I was enlisted, uh it was it was common that we'd have communal showers or situations where just for practical reasons, we had to get naked, we had to get naked quick because maybe you're going through some kind of a decontamination.

00:21:59.350 --> 00:22:15.269
And you know, there are situations where I'm uh working with medical professionals, and it's one of those things where they're they're trying to give me all of the the warnings and trying to make sure that they don't have a me too situation or or whatever it is.

00:22:15.509 --> 00:22:21.110
And I I have to tell 'em, like, I understand why we're here, let's just get to it.

00:22:21.190 --> 00:22:22.710
There's nothing sexual about this.

00:22:22.870 --> 00:22:23.670
Let's get to work.

00:22:27.029 --> 00:22:29.110
That's that's a good point, isn't it?

00:22:29.590 --> 00:22:33.830
That our programming Well, I don't know.

00:22:33.910 --> 00:22:37.750
I'm gonna I mean I uh I'm gonna go again with you know I live in Australia, live in the States.

00:22:37.910 --> 00:22:40.710
I have some German friends that this is not quite the same for.

00:22:41.190 --> 00:22:47.670
Um but often, you know, particularly uh in my culture, if you're nude, then that has something sexual to do with it.

00:22:47.750 --> 00:22:54.790
Like it's just nude, like it's just not and and that's not to say that it is it can't be sexual, because anything can be sexual.

00:22:55.190 --> 00:23:08.070
Um but it doesn't mean that it is just because you're nude or just because um yeah, so we we have this with this funny programming that nudity equals sexuality.

00:23:08.470 --> 00:23:11.990
I mean, there are lots of people having sex with their clothes on.

00:23:12.470 --> 00:23:12.870
Sure.

00:23:13.110 --> 00:23:13.990
Yes, yes.

00:23:14.150 --> 00:23:20.390
When when I was somewhere in my 20s, I got invited to a nude pool party.

00:23:20.630 --> 00:23:23.590
And it was a complex that was clothing optional.

00:23:23.750 --> 00:23:30.390
And so people were coming out of their house wearing nothing but a laundry basket to end, you know, headed over to the washateria.

00:23:30.550 --> 00:23:36.950
Um, there were naked people playing volleyball, and we were getting in line to get food at the food table and playing in the pool.

00:23:37.110 --> 00:23:42.710
And I came home for a holiday and was telling some of my family members about going to this nude pool party.

00:23:43.029 --> 00:23:46.630
And everybody was laughing and talking about it, and it wasn't this big deal.

00:23:46.710 --> 00:23:52.470
And my dad pulls me over the side afterwards and he goes, How did you do that?

00:23:52.630 --> 00:23:55.269
Like without getting aroused.

00:23:55.590 --> 00:23:59.509
And I said, gee, dad, I didn't even think about it.

00:23:59.670 --> 00:24:07.670
The pool party was it wasn't about sex, it was about nudity, and it's two completely different things.

00:24:07.830 --> 00:24:15.269
I mean, could it have had a yes, you know, is there likely when everybody gets naked that it could lead to that?

00:24:15.509 --> 00:24:19.509
Yes, but nobody, nobody in the pool, none of the men got erect.

00:24:19.830 --> 00:24:20.710
It was a mixed pool.

00:24:20.790 --> 00:24:21.990
There were men and women.

00:24:22.150 --> 00:24:24.470
None of the men got erections in the pool.

00:24:24.710 --> 00:24:35.670
I I didn't even think about that, much less, you know, but it was just a difference in how his generation saw it and how my generation saw it.

00:24:35.910 --> 00:24:43.269
I understand that most nudist colonies, when they go on these nude weekends, it is not about sex.

00:24:43.430 --> 00:24:46.550
I've talked to a bunch of people that have that are involved in that.

00:24:46.630 --> 00:24:48.070
It is not about sex.

00:24:50.150 --> 00:24:50.390
No.

00:24:51.750 --> 00:24:57.430
We we tend to, even though we feel shame about sex, we make sex about everything.

00:24:57.670 --> 00:25:02.630
We sell with sex, marketing is with sex, we just everything is done with sex.

00:25:03.190 --> 00:25:12.550
So I wanna, I want to give our our community a real life story, something they can really sink their teeth into.

00:25:13.029 --> 00:25:19.269
So we've talked about how sexual energy is just energy and can be used for anything.

00:25:19.670 --> 00:25:45.190
Can you tell a story in your own life where you creatively took that sexual energy and utilized it to achieve something, to do something to to yeah, that you that you set a goal with so they can really kind of get and and unpack that so they understand how that sexual energy is being used to do that.

00:25:45.830 --> 00:25:46.790
Sure, sure, sure.

00:25:46.950 --> 00:25:47.990
Okay, great question.

00:25:48.230 --> 00:25:51.750
So our I mean, our sexual energy, I take a little step back.

00:25:51.830 --> 00:26:02.310
Our sexual energy is, you know, I I kind of know that we, you know, we can make ourselves in petri dishes now, but essentially you still need a kind of spark.

00:26:02.630 --> 00:26:06.070
So for me, our sexual energy is that spark.

00:26:06.310 --> 00:26:27.750
It's that place in me that comes from that is connected to everything, that is connected to whatever, you know, if you want to call it the divine, the religious, but that place in us that makes that is the is is connected, that make that forms the oneness, forms our connection here, the oneness, the connection here.

00:26:28.150 --> 00:26:40.230
So when I so for me, that it lives within me, that lives within you, that lives within everyone, it lives within the trees, it lives within the grass, it the animal like it lives within all of us.

00:26:40.310 --> 00:26:47.190
We are all the rocks, you know, it lives it lives within everything, because that's kind of you know what our what we're here for.

00:26:47.350 --> 00:26:55.430
So connecting into that energy, um, and orgasmicness or as orgasms are frequencies.

00:26:55.830 --> 00:26:57.509
I mean, I think I get to say that now.

00:26:57.670 --> 00:27:09.350
I think we we are at a stage where you know we think everything's free uh frequencies, you know, whether it's sadness or happiness or you know the 528 hertz or the seven, like I think we we we know that uh everything is frequencies now.

00:27:09.670 --> 00:27:14.150
So I believe that an orgasm orgasm is a frequency.

00:27:14.630 --> 00:27:23.509
So when we're in tune with that frequency, then we can have orgasms with anything or anywhere.

00:27:23.750 --> 00:27:30.230
It's a frequency, it's something you are, it's not it's not something that somebody gives to you.

00:27:30.790 --> 00:27:44.950
I'm not saying the sharing's not great, not saying that that, but there is also this place within us that is ours, it's our sexual energy, it's our orgasm, it's our it's in here, it's not something outside.

00:27:46.310 --> 00:27:54.870
So when I'm setting up to create, you know, I guess a simple word could be sex magic, is is a is a term people would understand, or a ritual.

00:27:55.029 --> 00:27:59.750
I would do that in a ritualistic space, really simply a lot of the time.

00:27:59.910 --> 00:28:16.150
You know, I might have a nest, I might have, you know, and you know, this can be done individually or with a partner, but you know, I'm just gonna a nest and some candles, and maybe I've you know cleared the space a little bit, and I've made that there's cushions or I've made it comfortable as well.

00:28:16.310 --> 00:28:19.750
So I've set my space up.

00:28:19.830 --> 00:28:34.630
I'm also setting my intention for this is something that is going to be special, going to be sacred, going to be and then I would go into a ritualistic space or an erotic space with myself.

00:28:35.350 --> 00:28:56.790
Talk about me first, because that's the easy the easy part and go into a space of you know connecting with my body, my legs, my arms, and leaving probably because we want to build it, we want to build that sexual energy like a fire.

00:28:57.269 --> 00:29:05.670
So we want to put a little bit of you know, a little bit of kindling on it, we want to start a little bit of like like seduction.

00:29:05.830 --> 00:29:07.350
We don't want to rush in there.

00:29:07.670 --> 00:29:14.870
So we're putting a little bit of kindling in there, we're putting a little bit of you know, we're using the whole body, you might have I mean, and that can be an array of things.

00:29:14.950 --> 00:29:21.670
You can have lots of toys, you can have feathers, you can have leaves, you can have massage oil.

00:29:22.550 --> 00:29:25.430
And being curious, what does my body like?

00:29:25.590 --> 00:29:27.190
What does my body want?

00:29:27.910 --> 00:29:34.790
And then playing with that, like so, playing with arousal, playing with this feels really good, I like it, let's do more of that.

00:29:35.029 --> 00:29:39.670
And arousal is often like riding a like a surfer on a wave.

00:29:39.830 --> 00:29:47.990
You need to kind of if you want to keep going, you've got to find the next wave, you've got to find one one way is not going to do it.

00:29:48.070 --> 00:29:51.910
You've got to keep, you've got to keep riding it and working out, okay.

00:29:51.990 --> 00:30:00.230
So if I change my pressure, if I change my speed, if I bring it up, I bring it down, I bring I'm having fun because it's fun, yeah.

00:30:00.470 --> 00:30:04.470
So I it's yeah, I and I'm riding the waves.

00:30:05.110 --> 00:30:07.269
And I've you know set my intentions.

00:30:07.350 --> 00:30:12.710
So for me, one of the the bigger things that I can think about is wanting a I was wanting a partner.

00:30:13.509 --> 00:30:29.990
And something as people think something people can relate to as wanting a partner, and I used my creative energy and my sexual energy, and as I was you know, playing, I was also visualizing somebody else.

00:30:30.310 --> 00:30:32.470
You know, what would it be like if there's a partner here?

00:30:32.550 --> 00:30:33.350
What would it be like?

00:30:33.670 --> 00:30:38.150
Our mind actually doesn't know the difference between reality and fantasy, you know.

00:30:38.550 --> 00:30:40.550
True, true, true, true.

00:30:42.550 --> 00:30:56.310
Yeah, so bringing that partner in and then and feeling that and using that that orgasmicness to bring that home.

00:30:56.470 --> 00:31:00.870
I mean when we're creating we can have all the intentions we need we want.

00:31:01.110 --> 00:31:04.150
It doesn't mean we then have to hand it over as well.

00:31:04.470 --> 00:31:07.670
So having the intention and using this for this.

00:31:08.150 --> 00:31:22.150
I'm uh after that that process, I made I don't know, uh a Godzai, like a little um it's like a little craft thing that you kind of make.

00:31:22.230 --> 00:31:23.750
We I had already had everything ready.

00:31:24.150 --> 00:31:27.190
With with yarn, you weave it with yarn, yeah, like yarn, yep.

00:31:29.029 --> 00:31:30.950
That's it, that's it, that's exactly it.

00:31:31.350 --> 00:31:34.950
So don't isn't that called hijos in Mexican in uh Spanish?

00:31:35.190 --> 00:31:35.830
Hijos?

00:31:35.990 --> 00:31:38.230
I think that would make it nice.

00:31:38.550 --> 00:31:39.830
Yes, yes.

00:31:40.070 --> 00:31:48.390
So I use the energy infused into yes, um and then when I was finished, I then hung that up.

00:31:49.830 --> 00:31:55.830
Not long after that, I met somebody very different.

00:31:56.070 --> 00:32:02.310
So it was it was it was a very that was a a very poignant process in there.

00:32:02.710 --> 00:32:25.430
Um but over the years, you know, you can use you can you can use that energy for yourself for health and for projects and for money, and our sexuality often the clearer what I notice and what when I work with people is the clearer we get on our sexuality, often our bank account opens.

00:32:25.830 --> 00:32:35.509
As our heart opens, our pelvis opens, everything opens, we receive more, which then in turn often turns up in different kinds of money as well.

00:32:37.430 --> 00:32:49.750
I couldn't help but draw a certain connection that you you made as you were describing just the the negotiation sexually.

00:32:50.390 --> 00:33:06.390
Um when you're yeah when you're talking about riding the wave, it's very similar to what you're talking about with uh dealing with communities where there are different ideas and different ways of doing things.

00:33:06.710 --> 00:33:12.790
And the way that you bring everyone together is you're finding that kind of attunement.

00:33:12.950 --> 00:33:21.029
You're finding those things, those parts where you can agree and parts that need to be explored and negotiated.

00:33:22.070 --> 00:33:44.550
And it seems like no matter if you're dealing with just yourself, there's a level of that practice that you're doing just to just to be able to have an experience, and then when you introduce a partner, it's like you're engaging in that same level of exploration.

00:33:44.630 --> 00:33:52.310
You're doing more of that, and then you apply those lessons to other aspects of life.

00:33:52.550 --> 00:34:19.909
So when you're dealing with the community, it's like you've already worked on developing the skills and you can uh apply them in other contexts because of what you've learned through exploring uh your own sexual pleasure, your own the the boundaries of of what feels good and what's what you don't want and what's you know what's right for you.

00:34:20.150 --> 00:34:21.429
It's amazing.

00:34:22.630 --> 00:34:23.909
I think it's amazing too.

00:34:24.070 --> 00:34:25.909
I'm connecting some real dots here.

00:34:26.070 --> 00:34:34.549
You know, I've been aware of the sexual energy is energy for anything, but I never really delved into it very far to to figure that out.

00:34:34.789 --> 00:34:39.989
But I I have an experience that now I'm connecting the dots.

00:34:40.230 --> 00:34:47.750
Before I met Dwight, before we got together, I was single and alone for 15 years.

00:34:48.389 --> 00:34:55.269
And I've shared this with some of my friends, and most of the time they look at me like I have three heads when I say this.

00:34:55.670 --> 00:35:05.349
But I said, you know, I had stopped dating because I was wanting to focus on creating a relationship with myself.

00:35:05.589 --> 00:35:11.109
If I can't have a good relationship with myself, I'm probably not going to have a good relationship with another.

00:35:11.349 --> 00:35:14.069
And so I was really, really working on that.

00:35:14.230 --> 00:35:21.750
And I had gotten to a point in my life where meaningless sex just didn't appeal to me anymore.

00:35:22.069 --> 00:35:24.629
And so I had stopped participating in that.

00:35:24.789 --> 00:35:35.349
So I went for a number of years with z zero sexual partner, except for I realized that I could be my own sexual partner.

00:35:36.069 --> 00:35:40.629
Now, you know, okay, most people go, of course, we all masturbate.

00:35:40.789 --> 00:35:42.710
No, that's not what I'm talking about.

00:35:43.190 --> 00:35:56.149
Now, I'm not saying that there's not an actual physical orgasm that happens in it, but I literally would have these long drawn-out romantic sessions where I would make love to myself.

00:35:56.389 --> 00:36:04.149
I would touch my face and run run my fingers through my hair in a manner that I would want a loving partner to do.

00:36:04.389 --> 00:36:08.469
I would say the things that I would want to hear from a loving partner.

00:36:08.629 --> 00:36:14.389
I would whisper in my own ear all those sweet little nothings that we we call them.

00:36:14.629 --> 00:36:24.949
And I, and I went, I did this for a number of years, where I literally made passionate love to myself.

00:36:25.190 --> 00:36:30.949
And of course, I've never had anybody that listened to what I'm saying and went, wow, cool, I'm gonna try that.

00:36:31.670 --> 00:36:33.509
They all look at me like you're weird.

00:36:33.829 --> 00:36:34.789
You know, you've lost your mind.

00:36:34.949 --> 00:36:36.710
What I don't know, that's weird.

00:36:37.029 --> 00:36:37.349
Okay.

00:36:38.149 --> 00:36:40.469
If it's weird for you, that's fine.

00:36:40.710 --> 00:36:42.469
It worked for me in a beautiful way.

00:36:42.549 --> 00:36:55.909
It kept me sane, but I also can see where it prepared me for when he did show up in a way that I would not have been otherwise prepared.

00:36:56.149 --> 00:36:56.710
Yeah.

00:36:57.429 --> 00:37:20.710
And and I and I'm I'm listening to you talk and thinking about how, yes, I can I can now see where you could create that space and and be in that sensual with self-place and build that energy and then start to to bring in your visualization of the things you want to attract to yourself and use that sexual energy.

00:37:20.789 --> 00:37:22.309
That's profound.

00:37:22.949 --> 00:37:23.989
And I knew that.

00:37:24.230 --> 00:37:32.629
I I didn't I didn't know it, but I knew it enough to know that I wanted to have this conversation with you because I think that our community is ripe for this.

00:37:34.149 --> 00:37:35.269
Yes, yes.

00:37:35.429 --> 00:37:39.269
So Dwight, have you heard that story before?

00:37:39.589 --> 00:37:40.629
I I have.

00:37:41.109 --> 00:37:47.109
I I've I have, and I've I've been the the beneficiary of those practices.

00:37:48.710 --> 00:37:49.750
Oh great.

00:37:50.149 --> 00:37:51.029
Yes, yes.

00:37:51.190 --> 00:37:56.949
See, I mean, see, when I talk about it, people, you know, it is it is a bit crazy, so I'm in good company.

00:37:57.109 --> 00:38:05.429
Um, and when you know, when I'm working with people and I tell them this is what they this is their homework, their homework is that they need to go home and create a nest and make love to themselves.

00:38:05.589 --> 00:38:14.069
I mean, if we, you know, essentially if we don't know how to make love to ourselves, then, you know, either how do we make love to someone else?

00:38:14.230 --> 00:38:17.349
How do we know that it's how do we know that it's actually okay?

00:38:17.589 --> 00:38:22.710
But it's that's a that's a we also then put a lot of pressure onto other people that they have to get it right.

00:38:22.869 --> 00:38:29.109
If our body is not attuned and and know stuff and we don't want to have fun, that's a lot of pressure to put on someone else.

00:38:29.269 --> 00:38:31.670
And also I think it raises our bar.

00:38:31.909 --> 00:38:42.949
Like if we can have this sort of level of communion with ourselves, then you know, someone else external has to kind of bring, you know, has to bring that.

00:38:43.750 --> 00:38:44.869
They gotta bring the goods.

00:38:46.469 --> 00:38:47.029
Yeah.

00:38:47.269 --> 00:38:49.589
If I can do this on my own, what do you bring in?

00:38:49.670 --> 00:38:53.349
Like, well, it's and I and I I think we've lost some of that.

00:38:53.429 --> 00:38:58.309
And we kind of then go, oh, it's okay if it's okay if if sex is okay.

00:38:58.389 --> 00:39:01.029
If it's I mean, for for me, I don't have that.

00:39:01.109 --> 00:39:06.710
Like sex is, you know, you learn, you grow, you don't stay in awful sex.

00:39:07.429 --> 00:39:17.190
The the ability to love yourself so you can love others, the ability to make love to yourself so you can make love to others should be fundamental.

00:39:17.349 --> 00:39:21.670
It is fundamental, but we don't teach that, we don't preach that, and we don't see that.

00:39:21.829 --> 00:39:27.109
Most people, I feel so blessed in this lifetime that I came to the place where I could see that.

00:39:27.269 --> 00:39:28.469
It came full circle.

00:39:28.549 --> 00:39:34.309
It had, I was looking for it out here, and it had to come from in here.

00:39:35.670 --> 00:39:50.629
I and as long as I looked for it out here, it doesn't matter what it is, as long as I looked for safety out here, you know, as long as I looked for power out here, as long as I look for love out here, it didn't matter what it was, it was going to elude me.

00:39:50.789 --> 00:39:55.829
But the minute I found those things in here, then it showed up out here everywhere.

00:39:57.750 --> 00:40:00.549
The congruence between the inside and the outside.

00:40:00.789 --> 00:40:01.349
Yes.

00:40:01.589 --> 00:40:04.789
Yeah, yes, it's such a powerful conversation.

00:40:05.589 --> 00:40:06.869
What do you think?

00:40:07.589 --> 00:40:13.190
What do you think enabled you to know that like so many years ago?

00:40:13.349 --> 00:40:15.429
Like how how do you think you knew that then?

00:40:15.589 --> 00:40:27.829
That I needed to go inwards rather than outwards and not and just more partying, more that I and more of that, because that's often I think the way the other way we go is we kind of go, well, I'll just do more of it until you know.

00:40:28.710 --> 00:40:34.629
Well, I certainly, you know, I I did that in my early years, the the stuff that didn't work.

00:40:34.789 --> 00:40:38.710
I I I was I had a pretty traumatic childhood.

00:40:38.869 --> 00:40:41.269
I was I was bullied really, really bad.

00:40:41.589 --> 00:40:45.349
And and then I stumbled when I was about 29 years old.

00:40:45.509 --> 00:41:03.349
I just literally stumbled into a personal growth workshop and didn't even know anything like that existed, didn't know what it was, found myself in a room with a bunch of strangers, and it opened me up in a manner that the trajectory of my life permanently changed right there.

00:41:03.589 --> 00:41:07.750
It went from going this direction to completely going this direction.

00:41:08.549 --> 00:41:18.789
And I have I was 29, so we're talking, well, uh 50 years ago.

00:41:19.269 --> 00:41:21.190
Because I'm 79 now.

00:41:21.909 --> 00:41:25.269
And I no, I'm sorry, I'm 69.

00:41:25.509 --> 00:41:28.069
That was so that was 40 years ago.

00:41:28.309 --> 00:41:30.549
I'm making myself older than I need to.

00:41:30.710 --> 00:41:33.509
No wonder she went, oh wow, when I said I'm 79.

00:41:33.589 --> 00:41:34.710
You thought I was almost 80.

00:41:34.869 --> 00:41:36.629
No, I'm almost, I'm almost 70.

00:41:36.949 --> 00:41:42.629
But you just I I I thought thought you just wanted a nice to, you know, a nice big 69.

00:41:42.789 --> 00:41:45.509
You wanted to make sure that was the the number there.

00:41:47.589 --> 00:41:56.629
Oh I I just went on this trek throughout my life of exploring, you know, in here.

00:41:57.269 --> 00:42:04.629
I I wanted to know me, I wanted to be the best me that I could be, and I was willing to do whatever it took.

00:42:05.349 --> 00:42:07.109
And I've hit it hard.

00:42:07.269 --> 00:42:15.589