#092: Stop Letting Silence Decide What You’re Worth

1
00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:11.570
Dwight: Welcome to another edition of Community and Becoming for the Love of Creatives podcast.

2
00:00:12.350 --> 00:00:19.700
Dwight: I know that in episode 90, we talked about what it means to be one of one when you're in the room.

3
00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:25.019
Dwight: And this is gonna be related, but a little different. Stick with me.

4
00:00:25.820 --> 00:00:27.339
Dwight: Let me paint the scene.

5
00:00:28.190 --> 00:00:36.430
Dwight: Let's say that you've shared something that's meaningful to you, something that's important, something that you were expected to be greeted with some enthusiasm.

6
00:00:36.640 --> 00:00:39.729
Dwight: And… It didn't come.

7
00:00:40.030 --> 00:00:45.780
Dwight: It didn't come back. You shared something meaningful, And… then it got quiet.

8
00:00:47.160 --> 00:00:52.879
Dwight: Silence can become a loud story about your worth, if you let it.

9
00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:59.190
Dwight: Today, we're gonna talk about What silence may mean.

10
00:00:59.550 --> 00:01:05.190
Dwight: What it doesn't prove, and how to respond without abandoning yourself.

11
00:01:06.740 --> 00:01:09.959
Dwight: Bring one moment to mind right now.

12
00:01:10.510 --> 00:01:14.410
Dwight: Think about something you shared recently that was met with

13
00:01:14.650 --> 00:01:16.869
Dwight: Less of a response than you'd hoped.

14
00:01:18.580 --> 00:01:19.579
Dwight: You got it?

15
00:01:21.710 --> 00:01:26.449
Dwight: Now, What did you make that silence mean about you?

16
00:01:31.560 --> 00:01:40.419
Dwight: Hold your answer gently. Now, it may be a familiar story, something that you've allowed to spiral many times before.

17
00:01:41.110 --> 00:01:43.950
Dwight: But it's not a fact. It's just a story.

18
00:01:47.040 --> 00:01:54.840
Dwight: This episode isn't about finding the perfect interpretation when these things happen. No, it's more of an exercise.

19
00:01:55.430 --> 00:01:59.880
Dwight: It's about choosing More of a grounded response.

20
00:02:02.960 --> 00:02:07.870
Dwight: Let me ask, what would make this conversation most useful for you today?

21
00:02:09.340 --> 00:02:13.000
Dwight: So we'll start with talking about the gap.

22
00:02:15.590 --> 00:02:22.500
Dwight: Oftentimes, in this episode, I'm going to come back to a little bit of a structure. We're going to talk about

23
00:02:22.860 --> 00:02:23.930
Dwight: the event?

24
00:02:24.280 --> 00:02:25.360
Dwight: the story.

25
00:02:25.570 --> 00:02:26.809
Dwight: And the choice.

26
00:02:27.430 --> 00:02:31.600
Dwight: the event, Is what actually happened.

27
00:02:32.370 --> 00:02:40.640
Dwight: the story… is… What you ran away with in your head, like, what you concluded in that moment.

28
00:02:40.790 --> 00:02:48.230
Dwight: And that… and what you thought about what it meant. The story is… Yeah, just that.

29
00:02:48.750 --> 00:02:56.720
Dwight: The choice… That's what you do with that. It's where you go next, where you go from there.

30
00:02:58.030 --> 00:03:00.589
Dwight: If you get too grounded in the story.

31
00:03:00.900 --> 00:03:04.489
Dwight: Then, who knows what kind of good stuff you might be missing out on.

32
00:03:04.980 --> 00:03:09.299
Dwight: Your choice is to move on after.

33
00:03:09.920 --> 00:03:17.279
Dwight: You've let it go, and it's done what it's done. So, the gap is not a courtroom where your worth is on trial.

34
00:03:17.930 --> 00:03:18.780
Dwight: No.

35
00:03:20.040 --> 00:03:25.000
Dwight: The gap is just the actual event before you start to spiral into the story.

36
00:03:26.120 --> 00:03:34.940
Dwight: What interpretation have you been holding, or have you been making the fact in your… in the theater of your mind?

37
00:03:37.970 --> 00:03:40.449
Dwight: Sometimes we need to reach out and…

38
00:03:40.600 --> 00:03:50.339
Dwight: and ask someone what's really going on. Because there's a lot of things that can keep people in a space where they're not going to be as forthcoming. Let's face it.

39
00:03:50.580 --> 00:03:53.489
Dwight: In the modern world, we're all busy, we're all distracted.

40
00:03:56.460 --> 00:04:03.850
Dwight: The exercise that you need to get comfortable with engaging in is thinking about what you would do

41
00:04:04.260 --> 00:04:12.229
Dwight: If instead of that story about everything that you're worth, everything that you're about being wrapped up in what's on the other end.

42
00:04:14.350 --> 00:04:25.300
Dwight: Reminding yourself that life goes on, and your self-worth is not tied up in the response that you're gonna get from someone that may not have actually seen the question.

43
00:04:25.720 --> 00:04:36.549
Dwight: I know that if an email comes into my box, it might be a while before I actually see it. It's… it's tough to make it to the top of my inbox.

44
00:04:36.770 --> 00:04:39.520
Dwight: And it's probably that way for you, too.

45
00:04:39.650 --> 00:04:44.769
Dwight: Think about it. Just exercise a little bit of empathy. So…

46
00:04:44.990 --> 00:04:56.730
Dwight: To make it real, I'll share with you a little bit of the pain that I go through. For a lot of things that I engage in, I have to submit proposals to go and request

47
00:04:56.920 --> 00:05:05.190
Dwight: The opportunity to get in front of groups, to go and take stages, to go and facilitate groups.

48
00:05:06.050 --> 00:05:10.259
Dwight: And the nature of that is, I send my proposal, and then I wait.

49
00:05:11.740 --> 00:05:19.970
Dwight: I wait, and I hear back. You know, beautiful thing is these things come with deadlines, where you have to have your submissions done by a certain date.

50
00:05:20.230 --> 00:05:26.079
Dwight: And supposedly, they are supposed to respond to you in a timely manner as well.

51
00:05:27.080 --> 00:05:38.019
Dwight: sometimes I have that unfortunate thing that happens where they come back and they want me, but I've already had to move on, because life keeps lifin', and that's the way it is.

52
00:05:39.390 --> 00:05:51.490
Dwight: Now, the story I can tell myself while I'm waiting and I'm not hearing anything is, oh my goodness, why did I even try? They don't want anything to do with me. Like, why… why would they… why would they want to talk to me?

53
00:05:53.050 --> 00:05:55.070
Dwight: But I can also

54
00:05:55.450 --> 00:06:09.109
Dwight: just let go of it, and make the choice to move on to look for other things. Or I could make the choice of following up, saying, hey, did you get that submission that I sent you? I just wanted to check in and make sure.

55
00:06:10.060 --> 00:06:16.950
Dwight: No harm, no foul. It's… It's all in how you're wired and what your tolerance is.

56
00:06:18.390 --> 00:06:19.850
Dwight: Now, let me ask you.

57
00:06:22.040 --> 00:06:28.069
Dwight: Where have you turned a lack of response into a conclusion about who you are?

58
00:06:30.440 --> 00:06:31.840
Dwight: Sit with it for a moment.

59
00:06:35.090 --> 00:06:37.109
Dwight: So, let's move on to the next point.

60
00:06:37.840 --> 00:06:39.450
Dwight: Silence is data.

61
00:06:40.490 --> 00:06:44.349
Dwight: But… Let's not give it too much weight.

62
00:06:44.470 --> 00:06:50.849
Dwight: Silence is real information, or silence can be incomplete information.

63
00:06:52.260 --> 00:06:55.140
Dwight: It can mean that someone is busy.

64
00:06:55.850 --> 00:06:56.980
Dwight: Are you busy?

65
00:06:57.600 --> 00:07:07.110
Dwight: Well, I'm sure you are, and thank you for taking the time to listen to me, because there are a lot of things that you're not doing because you're doing that.

66
00:07:07.290 --> 00:07:14.650
Dwight: It could be that they're uncertain. They have a lot of great choices, and you could be on a short list. You don't know.

67
00:07:14.950 --> 00:07:20.079
Dwight: It could be that they're just disengaged. You know, going back to the first two.

68
00:07:20.360 --> 00:07:26.760
Dwight: Again, a lot of things come at people, and they have to make choices about where they're going to put their attention.

69
00:07:26.880 --> 00:07:38.160
Dwight: It could be that whatever it is that you might have offered might not be as important as something that their kids did that made it to where they had to put out a small kitchen fire, right?

70
00:07:38.380 --> 00:07:54.490
Dwight: It could be that they're in a situation where they're unsafe, because there's something that's just higher priority that they're working with, or they're overwhelmed, or they're just not ready, or… there's any number of things that could be making it so that they can't

71
00:07:54.650 --> 00:08:00.700
Dwight: Bring whatever it is that you might have presented to the top of their to-do list.

72
00:08:01.890 --> 00:08:04.100
Dwight: Let that go. And just remember.

73
00:08:04.410 --> 00:08:13.309
Dwight: Silence is data. It's not automatically a verdict, or a diagnosis, or a judgment that you're not good and you're not worthy.

74
00:08:15.430 --> 00:08:22.980
Dwight: We're all miracles, so… let go of that. Remember, if there's… Any doubt about

75
00:08:23.150 --> 00:08:31.539
Dwight: whether you are a wonderful human being, there's gotta be someone there that thinks you are, and I'll be in that camp.

76
00:08:31.670 --> 00:08:39.879
Dwight: you can reach out to me, and I'm sure you're… you have someone in your life that tells you how much you mean to you, to them.

77
00:08:41.799 --> 00:08:48.199
Dwight: Now, we don't want to force a positive story, either. I mean, remember, it's… it's silence.

78
00:08:48.790 --> 00:08:54.760
Dwight: It's as if we have to look at something that's inside of a… A mystery box.

79
00:08:55.130 --> 00:09:04.789
Dwight: We don't know what's there. We can guess about all of the clues that might come if we shake it, or if we pick it up and see that it has weight, but we don't know!

80
00:09:05.510 --> 00:09:09.090
Dwight: So don't run with a story, bad or good.

81
00:09:10.100 --> 00:09:12.659
Dwight: We have to be good with just…

82
00:09:12.950 --> 00:09:16.119
Dwight: Letting it be. Letting it be whatever it is.

83
00:09:17.890 --> 00:09:21.270
Dwight: We don't want to default to the harshest story.

84
00:09:21.690 --> 00:09:27.150
Dwight: Just because we haven't earned anything, it doesn't mean that they have rejected us out of hand.

85
00:09:29.720 --> 00:09:31.760
Dwight: Let's stop and ask another question.

86
00:09:35.190 --> 00:09:39.219
Dwight: What might be true, That you cannot yet know.

87
00:09:43.670 --> 00:09:46.919
Dwight: While that's simmering, Let's add another question.

88
00:09:47.920 --> 00:09:53.710
Dwight: What information would help you respond Instead of react.

89
00:09:55.460 --> 00:09:59.830
Dwight: And there's a subtle difference with the language there.

90
00:10:01.650 --> 00:10:10.990
Dwight: When we respond, we've taken the time to… do a deliberate action. We've…

91
00:10:11.570 --> 00:10:15.020
Dwight: Not allowed whatever that reflex is to take hold.

92
00:10:15.580 --> 00:10:27.210
Dwight: the reaction can get us in trouble. It could make it so that we miss out on opportunities, because they think that we're a little Froot Loops, we're a little bit too high-strung.

93
00:10:28.160 --> 00:10:30.690
Dwight: Whereas, a response.

94
00:10:31.210 --> 00:10:34.350
Dwight: It's something that shows that we have

95
00:10:34.560 --> 00:10:39.010
Dwight: Patience, sophistication, we can read the room, we have nuance.

96
00:10:39.630 --> 00:10:42.359
Dwight: We want to be in that space of responding.

97
00:10:42.770 --> 00:10:46.910
Dwight: Letting things simmer for a little bit before we pull the trigger on anything.

98
00:10:48.440 --> 00:10:53.090
Dwight: So let's move on to the next point. Let's talk about… What gets activated?

99
00:10:54.160 --> 00:11:03.089
Dwight: If you're working in creative fields, you might have gotten in because you had these high ideals. Creators…

100
00:11:03.320 --> 00:11:10.070
Dwight: Work in spaces where they're carriers of Care and hope. Identity.

101
00:11:10.200 --> 00:11:16.550
Dwight: You ask the tough questions, you present the things that might make people a little uncomfortable.

102
00:11:16.750 --> 00:11:18.200
Dwight: You take risks.

103
00:11:18.500 --> 00:11:28.259
Dwight: But here's the thing, not everybody's ready, and that's the friction that we have to rub up against. And you gotta be okay with that in some respects.

104
00:11:30.830 --> 00:11:32.990
Dwight: And because some people aren't ready.

105
00:11:33.250 --> 00:11:44.450
Dwight: That can put us in a precarious position where we're left thinking that we've missed the mark, or we're not… we're not growing in the right direction, we're not doing the right stuff. Stop!

106
00:11:47.560 --> 00:11:53.070
Dwight: As a creative, you gotta be used to working in the gray, dealing with some ambiguity.

107
00:11:53.270 --> 00:11:58.150
Dwight: And ambiguity can wake up some of those old stories.

108
00:11:58.360 --> 00:12:05.820
Dwight: You probably have nightmares about the playground bullies, or someone else that was saying they're all gonna laugh at you.

109
00:12:06.560 --> 00:12:12.720
Dwight: I get it. I've got some of my own. Mine is… mine that I carry with me is that

110
00:12:13.050 --> 00:12:23.170
Dwight: People would always say that I was too slow, because I was a thinker. I would allow things to go in many different directions in my head before I was willing to make any move to act.

111
00:12:24.820 --> 00:12:29.219
Dwight: And for you, it might be that there's this sense of…

112
00:12:29.730 --> 00:12:34.650
Dwight: Rejection, or invisibility, or being too much, or being not enough.

113
00:12:35.040 --> 00:12:36.849
Dwight: The feelings are real.

114
00:12:37.870 --> 00:12:41.460
Dwight: But the conclusion may only live in your head.

115
00:12:42.120 --> 00:12:46.250
Dwight: It may just be that elaborate story that you're running with.

116
00:12:48.670 --> 00:12:53.099
Dwight: Don't renegotiate your worth in that gap of not knowing.

117
00:12:54.490 --> 00:12:59.719
Dwight: Don't talk yourself into… or talk yourself out of things that might be…

118
00:13:00.650 --> 00:13:04.530
Dwight: Just waiting for you. You don't know. So just let it go.

119
00:13:05.390 --> 00:13:07.280
Dwight: So, another question for you.

120
00:13:08.090 --> 00:13:12.509
Dwight: What old story gets activated when people don't respond?

121
00:13:17.100 --> 00:13:19.359
Dwight: What do you want this moment to teach you?

122
00:13:19.680 --> 00:13:21.860
Dwight: Without using it to punish yourself.

123
00:13:25.790 --> 00:13:30.980
Dwight: Alright, simmer in the questions, and let's move on to the next point.

124
00:13:32.810 --> 00:13:36.020
Dwight: We're gonna call this Not Chasing the Echo.

125
00:13:37.170 --> 00:13:45.430
Dwight: So… Let's give you… a nice, clean process. We'll do it in steps. Number one.

126
00:13:46.450 --> 00:13:53.439
Dwight: pause before monitoring response. So, don't go and check the voicemail, don't go refresh your email.

127
00:13:53.560 --> 00:13:56.740
Dwight: Just… Breathe, pause.

128
00:13:58.730 --> 00:13:59.640
Dwight: 2.

129
00:14:00.420 --> 00:14:02.729
Dwight: Return to your intention.

130
00:14:04.310 --> 00:14:08.910
Dwight: Think about why you… Are engaged in the work in the first place.

131
00:14:10.970 --> 00:14:12.440
Dwight: Honor that why.

132
00:14:15.170 --> 00:14:16.480
Dwight: Number 3.

133
00:14:17.820 --> 00:14:20.189
Dwight: Ask what your work was meant to serve.

134
00:14:22.100 --> 00:14:23.550
Dwight: Let that be your North Star.

135
00:14:26.520 --> 00:14:27.880
Dwight: And number 4.

136
00:14:29.480 --> 00:14:31.250
Dwight: Choose one.

137
00:14:31.440 --> 00:14:33.740
Dwight: Grounded. Next action.

138
00:14:37.740 --> 00:14:41.389
Dwight: Don't go crazy trying to do a multi-step

139
00:14:42.020 --> 00:14:44.790
Dwight: Process and get wrapped up in something else, just…

140
00:14:46.120 --> 00:14:49.029
Dwight: Choose one simple thing to ground yourself in.

141
00:14:51.110 --> 00:14:56.189
Dwight: So that action could be… Just sending a follow-up.

142
00:14:58.560 --> 00:15:06.280
Dwight: You could… Clarify, or ask for clarification. Ask for feedback.

143
00:15:07.630 --> 00:15:12.360
Dwight: Maybe send it again, because… If he sent it through email.

144
00:15:13.260 --> 00:15:18.050
Dwight: And anyone that's interacted with me knows that if you've sent me email.

145
00:15:18.770 --> 00:15:21.300
Dwight: I… I probably did not get it the first time.

146
00:15:22.720 --> 00:15:30.649
Dwight: you probably have to send the email and send a text, or send something to let me know that you sent the email. So just share it again.

147
00:15:31.240 --> 00:15:32.169
Dwight: It's fine.

148
00:15:33.560 --> 00:15:38.000
Dwight: And another grounded choice is, just move on to the next thing.

149
00:15:41.170 --> 00:15:45.370
Dwight: Sometimes the… the message that we gotta get from the silence is.

150
00:15:45.640 --> 00:15:52.029
Dwight: That we gotta keep moving. We gotta… Keep… keep going to grow.

151
00:15:52.250 --> 00:15:53.889
Dwight: By doing something else.

152
00:15:54.770 --> 00:15:58.479
Dwight: Now, here's the thing, when it comes to creative work.

153
00:15:59.040 --> 00:16:05.960
Dwight: this stuff has to be seen, it has to be known, it has to be heard. So, visibility is a practice.

154
00:16:06.390 --> 00:16:10.189
Dwight: And practice can bring about visibility.

155
00:16:13.310 --> 00:16:18.780
Dwight: Another thing about that visibility, it… because it's a practice, it's not an applause meter.

156
00:16:19.540 --> 00:16:22.269
Dwight: You don't do it to get the likes.

157
00:16:22.700 --> 00:16:25.200
Dwight: You do it to grow. You do it.

158
00:16:25.520 --> 00:16:27.750
Dwight: To grow internally.

159
00:16:28.190 --> 00:16:30.570
Dwight: You do it to become.

160
00:16:31.420 --> 00:16:33.159
Dwight: Who it is that you're meant to be.

161
00:16:35.790 --> 00:16:39.060
Dwight: So, again, let's… let's present another question.

162
00:16:40.060 --> 00:16:42.049
Dwight: So ask yourself honestly.

163
00:16:44.710 --> 00:16:47.880
Dwight: Why did you share the work in the first place?

164
00:16:52.830 --> 00:16:54.900
Dwight: Who was it meant to serve?

165
00:16:58.390 --> 00:17:01.679
Dwight: And what's one grounded next action?

166
00:17:04.230 --> 00:17:05.790
Dwight: Okay.

167
00:17:05.970 --> 00:17:10.969
Dwight: Simmer in the questions, and let's move on to… The next…

168
00:17:11.440 --> 00:17:21.999
Dwight: main point, which I would say is for leaders. And to clarify, when I say leaders, I don't mean that someone that has direct reports, that's not the only thing. You could be

169
00:17:22.190 --> 00:17:31.929
Dwight: Day one street sweeper. If you carry yourself in such a way that you put one foot in front of the other, and you are…

170
00:17:32.120 --> 00:17:38.940
Dwight: Executing your tasks in a way that you can be proud of, And that people respect

171
00:17:39.700 --> 00:17:41.210
Dwight: You are a leader.

172
00:17:43.380 --> 00:17:53.629
Dwight: So, for you leaders, I want you to be mindful that silence in a meeting is not automatic agreement.

173
00:17:54.810 --> 00:17:57.009
Dwight: Let me paint a picture for you.

174
00:17:57.870 --> 00:18:10.530
Dwight: I know that there are some rooms where there's someone that's sitting at the chair of the board, we should say. They carry a lot more weight than

175
00:18:11.140 --> 00:18:12.780
Dwight: Anyone else in the room.

176
00:18:13.120 --> 00:18:19.400
Dwight: And… There's danger in that, because… In those situations where…

177
00:18:19.990 --> 00:18:28.339
Dwight: You are seen as a leader, either because of formal title, or because you have managed to build authority.

178
00:18:28.790 --> 00:18:32.980
Dwight: You can reach a point where a casual, offhand comment

179
00:18:33.290 --> 00:18:38.290
Dwight: has unintended consequences. It can cause things to shift.

180
00:18:38.460 --> 00:18:41.069
Dwight: So please be mindful of that.

181
00:18:42.040 --> 00:18:44.430
Dwight: In your case in particular.

182
00:18:45.010 --> 00:18:50.549
Dwight: You have to be remember… you have to be mindful of the fact that words become worlds.

183
00:18:52.720 --> 00:19:01.669
Dwight: If you picture in your head what it… what it's like when everyone goes scurrying, and the moment when the,

184
00:19:02.520 --> 00:19:09.520
Dwight: the Meryl Streep character in… the Devil Wears Prada enters the office space.

185
00:19:10.680 --> 00:19:15.140
Dwight: I… it's logical to think that

186
00:19:15.550 --> 00:19:21.890
Dwight: there are leaders who have that effect, and they might have it without even knowing it, so…

187
00:19:22.080 --> 00:19:24.370
Dwight: Again, just be thoughtful about it.

188
00:19:25.850 --> 00:19:38.539
Dwight: Don't try to fill space too quickly. I know that we live at a time where it's really important for people to feel like they have answers, or to act in such a way that they have such certainty.

189
00:19:39.930 --> 00:19:43.600
Dwight: But if you're in the leader's… leader's spot.

190
00:19:44.310 --> 00:19:47.499
Dwight: It's important for you to leave room for others as well.

191
00:19:49.680 --> 00:19:54.099
Dwight: A lot of times, people will try to say the things that they think you want to hear.

192
00:19:55.270 --> 00:19:59.539
Dwight: So, before people have had a chance to figure out

193
00:19:59.680 --> 00:20:02.639
Dwight: An angle that might be something that…

194
00:20:02.790 --> 00:20:06.990
Dwight: would be most pleasing to you. Ask specific questions.

195
00:20:07.940 --> 00:20:09.810
Dwight: Get them to actually think.

196
00:20:11.330 --> 00:20:13.990
Dwight: And you want to give people time to think.

197
00:20:14.540 --> 00:20:15.989
Dwight: or write.

198
00:20:16.810 --> 00:20:26.759
Dwight: Because people are wired differently. Everyone's going to come about things in their own time. They're gonna do things in the ways that work for them.

199
00:20:28.090 --> 00:20:30.510
Dwight: So give them that… that space.

200
00:20:33.710 --> 00:20:36.769
Dwight: You also want to make sure that

201
00:20:38.050 --> 00:20:42.250
Dwight: There's clear lines around what it is that people can…

202
00:20:42.530 --> 00:20:51.389
Dwight: can influence. You want to make sure that you make the space welcoming for those that might be a little quieter, or a little…

203
00:20:52.040 --> 00:20:54.930
Dwight: A little, timid when it comes to sharing.

204
00:20:58.440 --> 00:21:03.910
Dwight: And I know that this can be really hard for those that are wired to be

205
00:21:04.210 --> 00:21:06.249
Dwight: True leaders, in every sense.

206
00:21:07.040 --> 00:21:12.580
Dwight: But silence… Isn't a license to fill the space.

207
00:21:12.900 --> 00:21:16.740
Dwight: Silence is not always a cue to talk more.

208
00:21:17.370 --> 00:21:22.980
Dwight: It may be a cue to create better conditions, for others.

209
00:21:24.630 --> 00:21:26.860
Dwight: To start to occupy the space.

210
00:21:29.120 --> 00:21:32.640
Dwight: So, for you leaders in particular, here are some questions.

211
00:21:34.420 --> 00:21:36.110
Dwight: Whose voice might be missing?

212
00:21:39.750 --> 00:21:41.520
Dwight: What would make it safer?

213
00:21:41.720 --> 00:21:42.990
Dwight: or easier.

214
00:21:43.260 --> 00:21:44.780
Dwight: To respond honestly.

215
00:21:47.430 --> 00:21:54.080
Dwight: What question wouldn't invite A better answer than… Any thoughts?

216
00:21:59.050 --> 00:21:59.920
Dwight: Alright.

217
00:22:00.780 --> 00:22:02.240
Dwight: Bringing it all together.

218
00:22:04.430 --> 00:22:06.079
Dwight: Silence can be deafening.

219
00:22:06.560 --> 00:22:08.599
Dwight: And it can be uncomfortable.

220
00:22:09.220 --> 00:22:10.850
Dwight: For anyone at any time.

221
00:22:12.080 --> 00:22:14.259
Dwight: Let silence be a pause.

222
00:22:14.890 --> 00:22:16.170
Dwight: Not a verdict.

223
00:22:17.000 --> 00:22:22.149
Dwight: Not the space for some weird story to spiral out of control in your head.

224
00:22:25.060 --> 00:22:26.650
Dwight: Learn what there is to learn.

225
00:22:28.210 --> 00:22:30.299
Dwight: Take the appropriate next step.

226
00:22:32.190 --> 00:22:35.769
Dwight: But don't make your work smaller, or your voice quieter.

227
00:22:36.120 --> 00:22:38.130
Dwight: Or your future narrower.

228
00:22:38.430 --> 00:22:41.210
Dwight: Because the first response wasn't loud.

229
00:22:43.860 --> 00:22:45.220
Dwight: Here's another question.

230
00:22:47.690 --> 00:22:51.400
Dwight: What are you choosing not to make silence mean anymore?

231
00:22:58.100 --> 00:23:02.069
Dwight: If this gave language to something that you've been carrying.

232
00:23:03.320 --> 00:23:10.770
Dwight: Send me one sentence. What are you choosing to make, what are you choosing not to make silence mean anymore?

233
00:23:11.600 --> 00:23:13.099
Dwight: I'd love to read it.

234
00:23:14.230 --> 00:23:17.760
Dwight: I read every single response, and your words

235
00:23:18.200 --> 00:23:23.830
Dwight: may shape a future conversation here on community and becoming, for the love of creatives.

236
00:23:25.610 --> 00:23:27.010
Dwight: Until next time!

237
00:23:27.820 --> 00:23:29.160
Dwight: Keep becoming.